Do Cats Get Lonely?
We’ve rarely had only one cat at our house, sometimes too many to remember, and sometimes an extra foster litter or two. Like people, cats are social beings and generally do like to be around other cats and their people, but you may be wondering – Do cats get lonely? The answer is yes, and no, and sometimes in between, and depends on a lot of factors. Let’s look at some indications, solutions and some of our favorite products to help.
Could my cat be lonely?
Cats are typically thought of as somewhat aloof, unlike most dogs that seem to crave their human’s attention and companionship, but cats are more social than they are often given credit for. Their level of attachment to, and then their dependence on, or ‘missing’ a particular person depends much on their early life. We’ve seen the importance of socialization with the many foster litters we’ve had in our home. When we get a litter very young, with Mom, we’re able to nurture and love on the kittens as they grow and they’ll grow up to be highly social with humans, other cats, and as we also have Sunny the gentle Golden Retriever, the kittens will usually grow up with a dog as a normal part of a household and will do well with them in their forever homes.
Likewise, when we get them younger and without Mom, especially if they require bottle feeding, the kittens learn maybe even more dependence on their humans. These kitties grow into very affectionate cats, and likely suffer more from your extended absences.
We’ve also gotten older kittens with varied backgrounds, some we never know, as that’s the nature of working with a Shelter, and these tend to have more independent behaviors and less tolerance for closer human interaction.
Your experience may be similar if you’ve raised a kitten, or different if you adopted an older cat. But what are some signs your cat may be lonely, and do you get another cat for their companionship?
How to tell if my cat is lonely?
If you suspect you are living with a lonely cat, some behavioral indications may give you some clue. If you’ve been away for an extended period of time, you could be seeing some temporary clinginess from your feline. This is pretty normal and the kind of behavior that usually settles down once you’ve been back for awhile.
Maybe your absence was particularly long, or your hectic lifestyle has you away more than home. You might see some more concerning behaviors with your fur baby that can be challenging to correct. Are you seeing changes in their grooming routine? Cats are usually pretty meticulous about grooming, so if yours is looking a bit of a mess, they might not be grooming as normal, or maybe they’re over-grooming, often caused by some stress, like long Mom and Dad absences.
Has your kitty stopped eating like they had been? Eating more? Like humans, cats do change dietary habits out of boredom sometimes, so keep an eye on this as well.
Destructive behavior can be another indication of some stress brought on by loneliness. Like a toddler, they may be acting out if they aren’t getting enough attention. If you’ve noticed rips in furniture, items on shelves knocked over and broken, or using a bed or carpet as a litterbox, these can be indications of boredom and frustration.
You may also notice your kitty being less affectionate and more sluggish and sleepy than normal. Again, this can be a sign of malaise and depression.
You’ll want to rule out medical conditions of course and consult with your vet, but all of these are good indications your cat may be lonely if you’ve been away for a while, or being away is more normal than not. So, what do we do about it?
Tips for kitty enrichment
Be sure to have lots of toys for your cat to play with. You’ll want to have some you can use with them, but also a good selection of ones that they can play with on their own. They can be as simple as catnip mice, which stimulates both their chemical attraction to catnip, but also their prey instinct as they bat and chase their toy. If you haven’t brought any new toys home for awhile, try to introduce a few new ones if you suspect loneliness. This can help them to focus on what they should be playing with and not getting after some of your things.
A cat tree is also a great way for your kitty to get exercise, helping to ease the extra energy they may have built up over the stress of loneliness. Ideally try to place the tree near a window to give them extra stimulation as they watch the birds, people and trees outside. They’ll use the rope parts for scratching and hopefully give the couch a rest. Here’s one of our favorite cat trees.
We usually leave on some music when we’re gone as we’ve always felt that it provides some additional stimulation and provides some familiarity for our fur babies as we generally always have some music playing throughout the house when we’re home. You may also find that leaving a t-shirt or sweater that you’ve worn, but not washed left on the bed or a chair may provide your kitty with a familiar scent that provides them comfort.
We’re blessed to have a screen enclosure attached to our house where we spend a lot of time. We always allow the cats access to the area when we’re home, and we bring the foster kittens out as well when we’re sitting outside. This gives them some fresh air, some trees to climb, birds to see, etc., in a safe environment. If you don’t have a similar setup, a great alternative is a cat tent, which we also use inside our house to give our fosters some different places to hang out, during TV time, or when cleaning their other areas. We have several for fosters and they are so useful, easy to clean, and a safe place for them to chill.
Consider hiring a pet sitter to come to your home once or twice a day. This will not only keep the litter box scooped, but will give your baby some stimulation and interaction during the day or days when you’re not home. Be sure your sitter will do more than scoop and dash, and actually spends some time interacting, playing and petting. Most sitters will specify the amount of time they’ll spend in your home. Be sure to meet with your sitter before you actually need them, so you’re not picking at the last minute.
Should I get another cat for my lonely cat?
Most cats will do well with other cats, but here are some things to consider if you think your cat is lonely and are considering another kitty in your and her life. We’ve often been under the impression that kittens raised together in a litter do better when not separated to begin with. This may be true initially, but obviously isn’t always an option, and we’ve seen litters where all kittens have gone to different homes that are doing very well indeed. But if you are able to add one of your kitty’s littermates to your home, that should be a great result.
If you’re thinking of bringing home another kitty, it’s probably a good step to consider getting one the same relative age and size as your current baby. Please consider adopting a shelter cat if you have one near you. The shelter staff can help you pick a cat that is more sociable – be sure to ask how he does around other cats in the shelter. Explain to the staff what you’re looking for in a companion for yours, relate his temperament, and they’ll be happy to help you find a fit.
If you have a friend with a cat, you might consider bringing them together for a play date. This may help you decide if your kitty interacts well with others. Make sure both are spayed or neutered before the visit of course, as this can lead to aggressive behavior or unwanted pregnancies.
Some final words
So, do cats get lonely? At the end of the day, your cat wants your attention more than anything. They depend on you for their food, water and a clean litter box of course, but being social animals they form strong bonds with their humans, so be sure that as much as you’re able, you make time for quality interaction with your pets. Create that stimulating environment they need as well, with lots of toys and play things (many are super affordable), along with some perches with your favorite cat tree.
Tell us your experiences with a lonely cat and what you did to help. Also, we’d love to hear about your kitty and share some pictures as well on our Featured Friends page.